Let me show you what it’s like to be inside the brain of a writer.
I’m just sitting here, scrolling through social media, and I see that the current administration has labelled Harvard’s lawsuit as frivolous. Ha, thinks me. Everyone else’s side is always frivolous in a lawsuit. It’s like the term means nothing anymore.
Actually, thinks me, I thought frivolous was just supposed to mean fun. Like frivolity. With, like, cake and dancing.
So instantly a window opens up before me, and a packed courtroom is full of spectators and two lawyers arguing before a white-wigged judge.
A lawyer yells: “Your Honor, the defense’s counterargument is entirely frivolous! The responses to court requests, the explanations, the delays: it’s all a grand exercise in frivolity! The court must immediately admonish the defense for its frivolousness, and find in favor of the plaintiff for the full amount!” And the courtroom rumbles.
Another lawyer yells: “Your Honor, that’s not true! The plaintiff’s filings have been done in an entirely frivolous manner! It is they, not we — look at this! Page after page of nothing but frivolity! The defense immediately recommends sanctions, disbarment, and immediate jail time for all concerned in said frivolity!” And the courtroom murmurs.
The judge pounds the table. “SILENCE! This entire case is a textbook example of frivolity! The plaintiffs, the defendants, and yes, even the spectators in the courtroom and ESPECIALLY the photographers and reporters — a massive, inexplicable exercise in FRIVOLITY! The FRIVOLOUSNESS of this case is more FRIVOLOUSER than any other case I have ever seen — in fact, IT IS THE FRIVOLOUSEST!”
The judge pounds the table again. “COURT IS ADJOURNED!”
And a mirror ball comes down, and disco lights come on, and Rasputin by Boney M starts playing, and there is a dance party with cake and music.
Anyway, I’m just sitting there, watching all this through my window, and I’m like, thanks brain. Real creative. I’ll be sure to write that down.
